Grief is having your heart pulled out and having to endure the pain.
It is the craving you have that cannot be met. Or the time you lose your way on a road detour. You are still heading to your destination, but lost on how to get there.
Grief equals pain and it does not come voluntarily. It is uncontrollable as it is to breathe. No human being can keep the force long enough to strangle themselves, but if they allow it, they can cut off the air supply to their lungs by a different means of procedure.
Morbid, but true. Grief brings the idea of death and is uncontrollable in that way. Death is a spiritual thing. You cannot deny the mystery of what happens to person when they die. Who were they at all? The person you once knew. The body is still there and looks the same, but soon enough it won’t. It’ll decay and be gone away.
Was there something else inside them? Was it brain chemistry, hormones, environmental factors, or genetics that brought the smile to their face or the anger in their veins? Or was it something else? Was there a soul, as some claim? Was it something we should be aware of within own our bodies? Are we more than the weight of our skin that is bloodied and bruised? Are we more stable than the bones that we break? Are we something else? Perhaps more than flesh and bones?
C.S. Lewis once said, "No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear." The fear of death is more of a reality when a loved one has faced it. It comes to mind in the form of a color. Sometimes a face. It brings meandering thoughts of what it must look like when we someday face it. Is it a light or complete darkness? Is it glowing lights that we walk into or new eyes that see another side of the world? Is there a heaven or is there something less? What could get higher than heaven? What could be less than earth?
All the thoughts that come to mind when you grieve. You wonder if you are going to be sane enough to endure without the new memories being made with the one you loved. You wonder if the new norm will ever be grasped without tears. And you wonder if you'll ever stop the old habits that once included the lost one.
There is no greater pain, turmoil, or ache in the heart than grief. You find yourself thinking about your own life. You wonder if you have been doing things right all along as the loved one must have done. Pleasant memories of what they did justly in their lives come a float. Some negative thoughts may come along, but are quickly dismissed if they can be. It is like in a time of happiness that only misery can interrupt. So it is in a time of grief, only encouragement is its own relief.
You remember their sins against you no longer because you know they are at their most vulnerable place. Death has claimed them and they can longer defend themselves. That is when they are but just memories in the human mind.
No more are they able to redeem themselves nor able to harm. They are but a fragile soul. And the word 'soul' comes to mind because what else were they? Skin and bones? No, but they were the memories that were made and the ones we hold onto. They were a spirit within a body.
The grandfather who never gave up on his grandchildren. The mother who worked hard all her days for her children to be fed. The friend who made us laugh. They are the people we knew and cared for. They are the people who became a part of our hearts the moment we realized we loved them, whether it was consciously or unconsciously. And when they passed, a part of our hearts died off as well, but is still left as part of the whole beating heart we have. So that is where the heart ache comes from when we grieve.
Though the soil to their grave over time grows grass, we remember the person who impacted our lives in a beautiful way. We remember their concerns for us, as well as their love for us. And we loved them as well. Grief is a process for which we reposition our footing in this world. The person who used to be there can longer be there, so we turn one inch to our right and we look towards the skies. There is a time for overcast, sun, and rain. Depending on how long ago death came for the beloved. Thing is, sometimes the rain has passed and the sun shines again. And you think the rain is forever a mile away, but be aware it never ends because the earth needs to grow its fruit. The fruit is what bares after the rain, but in the sun it prunes, so again the rain comes to nourish it. So it is when we live our lives forgetting about death's door. Grief is the realization of death for someone else, but it is also the realization it will come to our door one day. It is not to be feared where we lose our footing to reposition our lives, but it is to be respected as the beginning of what we do not know for sure.
What is after death? Another new life on earth? Heaven? Hell? Purgatory?
It has to be something we have yearned for all along in this lifetime. Peace, enjoyment. All to no end. It has to be something beyond the biggest imagination could comprehend. Because what is left for the person who grieves? Who can understand this pitiful life on earth? Why do the seasons change? Why does the sun set one place and rise somewhere else? Why do others live comfortably and others mourn? Why is there death and why is there grief? All life is equal. All life ends. Grief brings some realization to this one fact.
Life is never long enough.
There is always something else to be had.
Death comes too soon and it is human beings' worse enemy.
It is humiliating and sad.
Be foolish and forget about it quickly.
Be wise and keep your grief somewhere in mind.
Because the reality of what grief does is bring a human being to their knees to question all of life's existence and the meaning of life at its core.
And it will be blessed with answers within time if we allow the answers to be spoken without restraint.
It is the craving you have that cannot be met. Or the time you lose your way on a road detour. You are still heading to your destination, but lost on how to get there.
Grief equals pain and it does not come voluntarily. It is uncontrollable as it is to breathe. No human being can keep the force long enough to strangle themselves, but if they allow it, they can cut off the air supply to their lungs by a different means of procedure.
Morbid, but true. Grief brings the idea of death and is uncontrollable in that way. Death is a spiritual thing. You cannot deny the mystery of what happens to person when they die. Who were they at all? The person you once knew. The body is still there and looks the same, but soon enough it won’t. It’ll decay and be gone away.
Was there something else inside them? Was it brain chemistry, hormones, environmental factors, or genetics that brought the smile to their face or the anger in their veins? Or was it something else? Was there a soul, as some claim? Was it something we should be aware of within own our bodies? Are we more than the weight of our skin that is bloodied and bruised? Are we more stable than the bones that we break? Are we something else? Perhaps more than flesh and bones?
C.S. Lewis once said, "No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear." The fear of death is more of a reality when a loved one has faced it. It comes to mind in the form of a color. Sometimes a face. It brings meandering thoughts of what it must look like when we someday face it. Is it a light or complete darkness? Is it glowing lights that we walk into or new eyes that see another side of the world? Is there a heaven or is there something less? What could get higher than heaven? What could be less than earth?
All the thoughts that come to mind when you grieve. You wonder if you are going to be sane enough to endure without the new memories being made with the one you loved. You wonder if the new norm will ever be grasped without tears. And you wonder if you'll ever stop the old habits that once included the lost one.
There is no greater pain, turmoil, or ache in the heart than grief. You find yourself thinking about your own life. You wonder if you have been doing things right all along as the loved one must have done. Pleasant memories of what they did justly in their lives come a float. Some negative thoughts may come along, but are quickly dismissed if they can be. It is like in a time of happiness that only misery can interrupt. So it is in a time of grief, only encouragement is its own relief.
You remember their sins against you no longer because you know they are at their most vulnerable place. Death has claimed them and they can longer defend themselves. That is when they are but just memories in the human mind.
No more are they able to redeem themselves nor able to harm. They are but a fragile soul. And the word 'soul' comes to mind because what else were they? Skin and bones? No, but they were the memories that were made and the ones we hold onto. They were a spirit within a body.
The grandfather who never gave up on his grandchildren. The mother who worked hard all her days for her children to be fed. The friend who made us laugh. They are the people we knew and cared for. They are the people who became a part of our hearts the moment we realized we loved them, whether it was consciously or unconsciously. And when they passed, a part of our hearts died off as well, but is still left as part of the whole beating heart we have. So that is where the heart ache comes from when we grieve.
Though the soil to their grave over time grows grass, we remember the person who impacted our lives in a beautiful way. We remember their concerns for us, as well as their love for us. And we loved them as well. Grief is a process for which we reposition our footing in this world. The person who used to be there can longer be there, so we turn one inch to our right and we look towards the skies. There is a time for overcast, sun, and rain. Depending on how long ago death came for the beloved. Thing is, sometimes the rain has passed and the sun shines again. And you think the rain is forever a mile away, but be aware it never ends because the earth needs to grow its fruit. The fruit is what bares after the rain, but in the sun it prunes, so again the rain comes to nourish it. So it is when we live our lives forgetting about death's door. Grief is the realization of death for someone else, but it is also the realization it will come to our door one day. It is not to be feared where we lose our footing to reposition our lives, but it is to be respected as the beginning of what we do not know for sure.
What is after death? Another new life on earth? Heaven? Hell? Purgatory?
It has to be something we have yearned for all along in this lifetime. Peace, enjoyment. All to no end. It has to be something beyond the biggest imagination could comprehend. Because what is left for the person who grieves? Who can understand this pitiful life on earth? Why do the seasons change? Why does the sun set one place and rise somewhere else? Why do others live comfortably and others mourn? Why is there death and why is there grief? All life is equal. All life ends. Grief brings some realization to this one fact.
Life is never long enough.
There is always something else to be had.
Death comes too soon and it is human beings' worse enemy.
It is humiliating and sad.
Be foolish and forget about it quickly.
Be wise and keep your grief somewhere in mind.
Because the reality of what grief does is bring a human being to their knees to question all of life's existence and the meaning of life at its core.
And it will be blessed with answers within time if we allow the answers to be spoken without restraint.
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