The first time I remember hearing about hell was when I
was about three years old. a neighbor boy said if you had ever done
anything bad you would go there. I knew I had done some things I shouldn't have, so I believed I was doomed.
I was in Sunday School most of my childhood, but
don't remember if I ever heard a clear explanation of how Jesus had
paid for my "bad things" until I was around eleven and had been
attending a revival meeting and came under conviction and understood
that there was hope for me after all. At the invitation time I went to
the front to pray, but I don't think I did because some well intentioned
people, one after the other, knelt beside me trying to help me, but
said a lot of things I didn't understand. I left confused and not sure
if I was saved. I didn't talk about it with anyone because I felt
stupid and was very shy. I was "baptized" and tried to be a Christian
for a while. During my teen and young adult life I ran from God, but
was in and out of church from time to time, but didn't feel comfortable
there. I heard a preacher say that if you didn't get saved when you
first felt convicted, after a time God would give up on you and you
could never be saved. ( The devil is such a liar!) Thinking I was
doomed, again, I became agnostic for a time. (I didn't know how a
loving God would turn His back on someone who wanted to be saved just
because they didn't respond in a certain time frame.) I was also
looking for power in some occult things. None of which would work for
me for some strange reason. I believe God was protecting me due in part
to my mother's prayers for all of her family.
I still had some of that junk, which I burned, when I
finally to accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was thirty three years
old. The story of how I woke up to the fact that God is real and the
Bible is the truth is too long to go into now, but the condensed version
is that we were threatened by a group of people who were involved in a
"get rich quick" scheme who were angry that we had spoken against them.
We really thought they meant to kill us. (Pretty weird, right?) Out of
all the craziness, I turned to the Lord for help and Romans 10:13 came
to me, "Whosoever will call upon the name of the Lord will be saved." and I knew that included me.
Hallelujah! I got on my knees beside my bed at 2:00 in the morning
and asked the Lord to forgive me and take over my life and He did! We
went to church the following Sunday and have been faithfully attending
ever since. Sorry to say, I have not always been as faithful with my
Bible reading and prayer. But the Lord has always been faithful and
there for me, even when I was less than deserving. (Are we ever
deserving? Uh, No!)
My mother was a
big influence in my becoming a Christian. While I don't remember her
talking much about her faith as we were growing up, she did attend
church and was a very good example of what a Christian should look
like. After I was saved we had a lot of conversations about the Lord,
especially in the last few years of her life. She was concerned about
our lost family members and would be happy to know about those who have
accepted Jesus since she went to Heaven. Hopefully we will be "salt and
light" for those of our family that are still in the dark. It is hard
to talk to those closest to us sometimes, but we have to keep speaking
up when we feel led and keep on praying for them.
I do want to say I was Baptized after I was saved.
Also, I can say without a doubt, He does take care
of His own. Even the least of us!! I could not make it a day without
Him to turn to.
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